Dib Gets Sugar High!
by Leftomaniac
Summary: Sequal to 'Zim Gets Sugar High'. Zim and Dib decide to have a final battle, but they're both incredibly sugar high! ^_^


I needed to give the part of my brain that thinks up something vaguely resembling a plot a break, and do a sugar high fic. For those of you who haven't read 'Zim gets sugar high' I will now explian the enire complex plot of it in detail:  
  
Zim gets sugar high. Then he has a relapse. *pause* Now that you're all caught up...  
  
No own. And of course they're ooc, they're sugar high!  
  
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Dib got home in a bad mood. He had come home in bad moods lots of times before, but this time it had nothing to do with trees. Zim had freaked out in the middle of class today, which was nothing compared to how he had acted the night before. Dib knew he had to be up to something. I mean, people don't do crazy things like eat nugat unless they're planning something. Maybe Zim was trying to confuse him until his brain exploded. It was working so far. As Zim raced by with seven oranges in his mouth outside, Dib stalked up to his room to do researchy stuff.  
  
-----Twelve hours later-----  
  
Dib could hardly keep his eyes open. He had tried everything, cold water, jumping jacks, propping them open with toothpicks, but nothing worked. He looked at the clock. It was three a.m., and Dib still had no idea what Zim was planning. He decided to go dowstairs and have a Diet Poop. The caffine would do him good, and for some strange reason he was under the impression that he needed to lose weight. He sat down at the kitchen table with his Poop and took a few sips. After a while he realized it just wasn't enough. He needed something *stronger*... His eyes strayed to the coffee pot. He had never had coffee before, but there was always a large supply of it in the house. His dad practicaly lived on it.(A/N: Seriously! Have you seen the way he moves? And the rate at which he talks? And does he EVER sleep??) As he felt his head sink back into the chair cushion, he made his decision. He walked up to the counter.  
  
He had never made coffee before, but he had seen his dad do it lots of times. First, he needed to put in a filter. Then, he needed to put some coffee grounds in. He put the filter in and stood, holding the can of coffee grounds, looking contemplative. Now, how many scoops did his dad usually put in? Three? Four? Better make sure, he decided, filling it to the top with ground coffee. He then poured in the water and started it. After a few minutes the coffee was ready. He poured himself a cup and took a sip, immediatly spitting it out. "Blech!" he cried, "This stuff tastes like chalk!" At that point, CryingChild reached through the computer screen and slapped him. "Ow!" he said, "What was that for?" He decided some sugar would make it taste better. He got one of those 8lb bags of granulated sugar out of the cabinet, and dumped it all in a cup somehow. "Well," he said, looking unentusiastically at the brownish, sludgy mixture before him, "This one's for humanity!" And closing his eyes, he downed the entire pot in one gulp somehow.  
  
He coughed. He choked. He fell to the floor. Then, slowly, a pale hand rose up onto the counter, and Dib's head shot into the air. He had a look in his eye that made him look much more like Nny than usual. He began giggling insanely.  
  
Fun Fact: Now Dib's got the buzz too.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Dib's scream of terror rung throughout the Membrane house. Gaz, who was always up late anyway, walked down, agitated. "What is it Dib?" she asked, not seeming to care at all. "My... my ears! My ears are gone! I miss them!" Gaz raised an eyebrow. Dib's gigantic ears were on the sides of his head, as usual, but they were each covered by a mitten. Dib cried. "I want you back Mr. Ear!" Then he started singing. "I want my eary back eary back chiiiiili's, eary back ribs!" He began dancing around Gaz. "Barbacue sauce!" he squealed delightedly. Gaz growled and held up her fist, which Dib walked into knocking him to the ground. As Gaz stormed up to her bedroom, Dib stood up. "You're right Gaz! I need Pop Tarts!" Gaz growled a response from the top of the stairs, but it was unprintable. (^_^) Dib struck a dramatic pose. "Yes! I will get Pop Tarts, the fate of all mankind depends on it!" Dib ran out the door, but forgot to open it first. After about seven tries, he lept out the window.  
  
Dib ran up into the 24-Mart, which was already in pandamonium. After consuming an economy sized bag of rock candy, twelve liters of that red Mountain Dew, and all the Pop Tarts in the store, he found Zim, in the cleaning products section, drinking all the Drain-o he could find. (A/N: See 'Zim gets sugar high') "Zim!" Dib cried. "Zim!" Zim cried. "I'm not Zim, you're Zim!" Dib cried. "Nuh-uh!" "Yuh-huh!" "Nuh-uh!" "Yuh-huh!" "Nuh-uh!" "Yuh-huh!" This incredibly stupid argument continued for hours, and neither sugar high wore off. Finally Zim agreed. "Fine! I'm Zim! And I am the greatest, most Zimmyest Zim EVA!" He began running in circles. "I will rule the world and take all the potatoes! Potatoes are invested with magical powers!" "No!" cried Dib, "You will never control the world's potatoey goodness! For one day I will have your belly button on an autopsy table!" This sparked another lengthy 'nuh-uh/yuh-huh' fight.  
  
"Fine Dib, you wanna move my cheese, then let's settle this once and for all!" he picked up a mop and charged Dib, missing him by over three feet. Dib grabbed a bottle of windex and squirted himself with it. This caused Zim to scream in terror. Zim grabbed a baby who was being pushed by in a carrige and threw it at Dib. Dib ducked, but the baby's diaper flew off and hit him in the face. "Aaaaaa! Not a diaper!" screamed Dib, running around with the diaper on his face, "I have a crippling fear of dookey!" Meanwhile, the baby skidded into the next aisle and exploded. Dib turned to Zim, not bothering to remove the diaper. "I will avenge my waxy buildup!" he screamed, grabbing a box of soap flakes and hurling them at Zim.   
  
Zim coughed. "Nooooo! Soap flakes are an endangered species!!!" He then began babbling about being named Luna. Meanwhile, Dib had moved to another asile and was admireing himself in the mirror. "Coming soon to a store near you!" he said announcer-style, while adjusting his diaper, "Poopwear!" Zim ran up next to him, still coughing, but now babbling something about a conservation program for soap. Dib grabbed a rubber squeak toy and stuck it up his nose. "Alright Dib, if you're going to fight dirty, then the golf clubs will grow! Burping is good exercise!" Zim grabbed a box of cake mix, and a throw pillow. He poured the cake mix on the pillow, making it look like a giant powder puff. He then began beating Dib with it. All this time, Dib was staring facinated at a vegetable display.   
  
By the time he noticed Zim, he was covered in white, squarish prints. He stared down at his clothing in horror. "Cake prints! You'll pay for that Zim!" He cried. "I think not, poopy head!" replied Zim, "For my head is made of nail polish!" Zim laughed and climbed to the top of the aisle, where Dib threw a box of Trix at him. Dib missed, and the box landed by his feet. He looked down at it, pointed, and screamed. "The bunny! The horrible bunny!" He fell of the aisle and onto Dib, knocking both of them onconcious. CryingChild took a picture and sold it to a ZADR fan for lots of money. And the exploding baby went on to star in Scary Movie III. And everyone lived happily ever after, The End.  
  
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I'm writing this at 2 am, because I'm not supposed to be on the computer. Fortunately, my parents are notoriously hard sleepers. My mom once slept through a (small) tornado, I hope to one day best her by sleeping through the apocolypse. Also, as long as I'm babbling about myself, I may as well mention that I won't be able to work on any of my stories for the next couple days, as I'll be going on an overnight trip to downtown Chicago. (Fun!) I'm gonna see Second City! 8D I'm as happy as a drooling baby. 


End file.
